Signs you are dating a man not a boy

Whether the person before her just has a cunning tongue that spews empty promises or is a gentleman true to his word. Regardless of age, the mental maturity sometimes eludes the opposite sex and their lower package commandeers their mind, throwing respect for women and their own dignity out the window. But there are a select few who have reached an admirable state of mind.

These rare breed of educated men have surpassed social puberty and practices the lost arts of chivalry and honor. Not everyone is perfect but there is common agreement in what separates the two. Gone are the days of gloating about their vices and instead replaced by articulating their present stature and future with class, intellect, and tact. Now there is a spectrum where one could be on the verge of graduating to one side over the other but this barometer is based on the upper and lower echelon of each category.

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Curious to know which one embodies your significant other? A boy is arrogant and loudly brings to limelight every single accomplishment he has done while simultaneously denouncing his competition. A man is secure enough within himself to publicize his success in an appropriate manner because he feels he has no need to prove himself to anyone while a boy seeks attention by being obnoxious about his announcements and degrading others to better himself. He will secretly look for the physical lurking eyes of girls who crave a man with trophies on display and comments and likes on his social media page to validate his status.

A man welcomes the accolades but does not seek them. One commands through influence and leadership while the other demands with noise and fallacies. A boy will play games and entertain the possibility of other options that is available to him while talking to you. When it comes to the prospect of a relationship, a man will be honest and candid with his feelings from the beginning. If a man has strong feelings and would like to initiate an intimate and serious relationship, he will explicitly indicate it.

If not, he will respectfully let you know and avoid dragging it out for his leisure. He will not allow it to be an unrequited courtship. A boy on the other hand will enjoy your company while in the midst of others unbeknownst to you.


Friends with bene t? Exclusive but not official? One sees it as an opportunity to build a monogamous future with someone they feel is special while the other looks at it as an opportunity for an ego boost without severing ties from potential candidates. A boy will either shut down, blame you, or put on a facade to acknowledge the issue then move on to avoid having to actually address the problem.

What I mean by lack of attention is that it is usually recognized but never fully addressed and resolved. A man does not run at the first sight of adversity. He will respectfully listen to your side of the argument and then voice his opinion while ending a solution and compromise. He will not ignore the animosity that might brew and understand that if left alone, it can torment the relationship in the long run.

He has an uncanny ability to understand your body language and know that suppressing emotions can be extremely detrimental. A boy will do the opposite. He will want to avoid having to x or even speak about what happened because it will force him to face emotions he deems are weak and unnecessary.

One sees this obstacle as a chance to strengthen the relationship while the other avoids it like a plague for fear of further becoming more involved and taking responsibility. A boy will constantly want you for your beauty and your body with little adherence to your intellect.

It is something that I have preached since the inception of e Modern Alice. Beauty is only skin deep and eyesight is fickle. A man will love you for all things that encompasses who you are—that includes your beauty, your body, and your mind. He will admire your personality and the person that you are beneath the makeup and the stylish wardrobe. He does not treat you as a trophy to be displayed and stroke his ego boost, instead he proudly shows you off because of the kind of woman you represent.

To him your attraction stems from intelligence, your wit and humor, the quirky little things that only you reveal to him, and the way you make him feel when you have a bare face and only his t-shirt and boxers on. A boy on the other hand prides himself on having the prettiest, baddest, and most lusted woman in the area.

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He will expect you to look your best and be openly vexed if a hair is out of place. Aesthetics is big for those who have not yet matured as it is a barometer for social acceptance. A boy will ensure that he is at the forefront of your priorities and will visibly voice his discord if the situation was not to his expectations.

A boy can see this space as threating, thus making him insecure, reactive, and jealous when his girlfriend wants to maintain some element of freedom and independence within the relationship. Most importantly, a man wants this freedom and independence himself within the relationship, which creates a much healthier dynamic of two full people coming together to be even stronger as a unit. A boy tries to grapple with this insecurity by not allowing you to have your freedom — for example: A strong man will support you and push you in the direction of your goals and dreams, while a boy will be intimidated by your success and drive to succeed.

Men, generally speaking, have worked hard to produce their own things that give them confidence and allow them to feel secure in who they are, so they are nothing but supportive to a woman who is creating big things for herself. Or can he allow you to sometimes have a starring role and stand back, clapping for your successes? This is a very toxic communication pattern…but does he hold grudges and labour after arguments?

12 Signs You’re Dating a Man, Not a Boy

This is definitely a big one, but self-improvement is the name of the game for men. So, is your guy seemingly stagnant, just wading around and not looking to improve his life, his career, or trying to eradicate and improve negative habits? Boys are afraid of conflict in a relationship. In particular, emotional conflict. A man is not afraid to have the hard conversations and deal with the tough emotions in a relationship, because he knows those conversations are what allow you to become closer as a couple, and both find freedom within the relationship.

Is he always looking for you to lead and make the decisions? Of course there are passive men out there.

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  • Not every guy is naturally assertive, decisive, and comfortable being the one leading his lady. Not only in a relationship, but becoming more assertive and action-oriented allows you to obtain the things you desire in life much easier, because you actually have the confidence in yourself to to go after them, unapologetically.

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    You want to be with a man who is going to be able to make decisions, take actions, and be assertive in his life, not just for your union as a couple, but for himself as well. Do you fee like your guy is closed off? A man knows who he is and allows that to shine in your relationship.

    A boy can often be struggling to find his personal identity as a man, which carries over to him not knowing what role to play within your relationship.

    Signs You’re Dating a Boy, Not a Man

    A boy will likely struggle to take his ego down for long enough to admit his mistakes and failures. But a man has the wherewithal and intelligence to objectively look at himself and admit to his wrong doings. We and our trusted partners use cookies and tracking technologies to create custom content for your enjoyment and to provide advertising in line with your interests.

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